Riddle 026: Raining on Prom Night

[questionauthority]

[A: 726 Anderson Lane - BACKDATED TO THE DAY AFTER PROM.

Riddle me this: Who's as green as his suit and just woke up with the worst hangover ever? Answer: Edward Nigma, of course. Family members and unexpected visitors will find the Riddler downstairs at the breakfast table, dressed in a green bathrobe, half-heartedly fumbling with his daily crossword while he picks at a plate of eggs. He looks incredibly groggy, tired, and somewhat foul-tempered.]

[B: Mayfield High School - TODAY. It appears as though your favorite Ethics teacher is looking a little bit better after a long weekend and some time to recover. On the chalkboard, there appears to be a hastily drawn picture of a man with a long face and a garish smile.]

A dangerous criminal has been apprehended. Caught red-handed. He's responsible for the deaths of countless innocents. Question: How do you proceed? Do you take an eye for an eye and serve him a death penalty? It only makes sense, doesn't it? Especially if you consider the possibility that he may escape from his prison. And it's true. He could certainly escape and kill again. And again.

For the safety of these innocents, and for the good of the people, it may be worthwhile to consider a utilitarian approach. That is to say, you would subscribe to a system of ethics in which you would seek to increase the safety, happiness, and well-being of all mankind to maximum levels. But...

[He draws up another picture on the chalkboard of a cloaked figure, shrouded in a long, flowing cape.]

...there are those who might disagree with you. Those self-righteous radicals who feel as though they should follow the rules. Whose rules, exactly? Their rules. Their morals are absolute. They simply can't be compromised. Even if executing a murderer and a madman will maximize our well-being, murder is still murder to them. Nothing changes that. This is a deontological approach, class. And the ends never justify the means to them.

...so riddle me this. What would you do, if you had a say in this criminal's fate?

[Around Town:

There's a good chance that, after school, you'll find the Riddler on an investigation. He'll be found in one of three locations---

C: Sniffing around the Zemekis Corps Office Building, trying to get a grasp on what exactly it is that people do here.

D: In the Downtown area, glancing into windows and occasionally taking notes on a small notepad.

E: At the Mayfield Hospital, to answer some questions. A hospital in Mayfield seems rather arbitrary, doesn't it? Especially considering that death isn't even permanent. Why would one even be here, then, if that's the case?]

Comments

E

[hungry-monster.livejournal.com]

[Walking past the doorway...oh. Stopping.]

Hello Edward.

[puzzlerprince.livejournal.com]

[Johan Liebert and hospitals. Not exactly a very comforting image.]

What brings you here?

B

[commentboxtroll]

[That's a deep and relatively tricky issue to consider, so Caesar's going to resort to a far less important question instead. There is no hand-raising before he asks it, he just does.]

And the self-righteous radicals are wearing weird capes because...?

[puzzlerprince.livejournal.com]

It's impolite to call out, Mr. Silverberg.

A

[strike-you-out.livejournal.com]

[Edward will find his newspaper torn in two but the crossword puzzle is somehow still in tact. He will also find his not!son at the table as well, having recently returned from delivering the news. There's a Batman comic book on the table which he's busily thumbing through as he nibbles at his toast.

On the stove, a tea kettle starts wailing relentlessly. Slugger makes no move to get it...]

[puzzlerprince.livejournal.com]

[Nothing, for a moment. Edward clutches at his head, cursing under his breath. That kettle is loud. Finally, when he's certain that Slugger isn't going to do anything, he rises to his feet and marches to the stove. You can probably hear him muttering under his breath about how he "has to do everything himself."]

D

[lunawolves10th.livejournal.com]

[On his way to work, dressed in his Waiter's outfit.]

Hello there...

[He blinks at him for a moment.]

What -are- you doing?

[puzzlerprince.livejournal.com]

[It never ceases to surprise Edward, how often he seems to run into this massive marine in some new kind of outfit.]

Garviel.

If you must know, I'm conducting an investigation of the downtown area.

B:

[flameyedhunter.livejournal.com]

If there is a law which covers him, you should obey it.

Exterminating people simply for the sake of the greater good is lazy thinking. If the system is failing -improve the system-.

[puzzlerprince.livejournal.com]

Hmm. How do you go about improving the system, then?

E

[brotherseyes.livejournal.com]

[Nina seems pretty out of it as she wanders the halls of the hospital. So much so that he actually bumps into Edward without realizing he's there. When she looks up to see who she bumped into, she gives him a cursory glance and then looks back down, murmuring.]

Sorry.

[puzzlerprince.livejournal.com]

[Edward groans.]

Watch where you're---

[Then he realizes who he's run into.]

Ms. Liebert. ...you'll have to excuse me for the other night.

B

[perfektsymmetry.livejournal.com]

Murder is always wrong, it doesn't matter what the circumstances are. But I know most people would disagree with me on that. They would seek the death penalty.

[puzzlerprince.livejournal.com]

They likely would, Mr. Crowe.

Is murder always wrong, though? Consider the possibility of murder as an act of self-defense. Is it still wrong, even in that context?

B

[notsaul.livejournal.com]

De... Deon... Deonto...

[damn it man not everyone knows them fancy words of yours]

[puzzlerprince.livejournal.com]

Deontological.

Try to keep up, Ms. Goldstein.

E

[spellbent]

[ Warren works at the hospital, though he sure as hell doesn't want to. He can be found sitting behind a counter somewhere, lobbing pencils at the ceiling in hopes of getting them stuck up there.

Yeah. Not even attempting to look busy. ]

[puzzlerprince.livejournal.com]

[Edward spots Warren fairly quickly---a guy lobbing pencils into the ceiling certainly isn't that hard to miss.]

Charming.

D

[riastrad-ridire.livejournal.com]

[All in all, Lancer was in a pretty good mood after the prom. He was right back to his usual habit of wandering around town doing investigation in his own way. Which looked remarkably like screwing around and doing nothing.]

[Though that was better than looking ridiculously suspicious with a notepad, in his opinion.]

...okay, I'll ask: what're you doing?

[puzzlerprince.livejournal.com]

Taking notes.

D

[crazyclownwoman.livejournal.com]

[Popping up behind you.]

Whatcha' doin?

[puzzlerprince.livejournal.com]

[Oh hey Harley.]

Being productive for a change. I've been slacking.

D

[greatestmanll40.livejournal.com]

[Lex walks up to Edward.]

Still trying to solve the riddle that is Mayfield?

[puzzlerprince.livejournal.com]

[A condescending smirk.]

You don't have to be the smartest man in the world to see that, Lex.

D

[buildstherobots.livejournal.com]

You're taking notes, too? Tell me there's not some new clue hanging around that I've overlooked; Mayfield can't have dulled me this quickly.

[puzzlerprince.livejournal.com]

[Edward nods, flipping through his notepad.]

So far, nothing out of the ordinary.

A

[deaths-heritor.livejournal.com]

Ah. The sight every woman wants to wake up to see.

A beautiful morning, Edward, isn't it?

[Susan will lightly sweep towards the windows and draw the curtains wide to let the lovely morning sunshine in.]

[puzzlerprince.livejournal.com]

[THE LIGHT. IT BURNS.

Edward shields his eyes with his hands, hissing in irritation.]

E /fashionably late to de party, of course *puts on sunglasses*

[beyondthecowl.livejournal.com]

[Bruce is making his usual rounds, clipboard in hand. He's scrawling something with a fountain pen, when he just so happens to look up.

Oh. And now his eyebrow is trying to meet his hairline.]

Nigma?

. . . Is there something you need?

[puzzlerprince.livejournal.com]

[That's a voice that the Riddler isn't expecting to hear. He gives Batman an appraising look. A bit of confusion.]

...you work here?

B

[crimson-flashed.livejournal.com]

[Coolly, without batting an eyelash.] Kill that person without being seen.

[puzzlerprince.livejournal.com]

...didn't miss a beat, did you?

B

[have-your-lives.livejournal.com]

[After Edward's last class has let out - after the students have left the room, but before Edward's had the chance to do the same - a certain telepath stalks into the room. And it's clear from a single look at his face that this is no social call.

He didn't even contact Edward after the man murdered him, but judging by his expression now, the man's having talked to Keane last night was enough to turn Schuldig borderline homicidal.

He crosses the room in a few strides, resting his hands on Edward's desk and leaning over it. If he feels any deja vu or trepidation, standing in the place where he died a week or so before, he's not showing it.] We need to talk. [The words will ring in Edward's ears and his brain simultaneously, presumably for emphasis - either that or Schuldig's so angry he's broadcasting without even realizing it, which is probably much worse.]

[puzzlerprince.livejournal.com]

[Edward should have figured that it wouldn't take very long before Schuldig approached him. It was bound to happen sooner or later, considering the things that he'd seen that night. The things that he'd heard.

The bit of deja vu that surges through him just now doesn't help matters much either.]

C-calm down.

D

[freakinblur.livejournal.com]

[Why look! It's Officer McCann. He walks up to Edward while he's peering into a window taking notes. He's twirling his nightstick around and does his best attempt at a Grady impersonation. It's better than you'd expect.]

Well well, what have we here, creepin' around?

[puzzlerprince.livejournal.com]

[It's enough to make Edward flinch a little bit, before turning around to find Scout. Still, even considering how much of an ass he made of himself the other night, he attempts a bit of levity.]

Didn't see you there, Officer. You startled me.

B

[miraculous]

[Bernkastel doesn't look old enough for this class, but she tends to show up to any class that's not drone-taught regardless of subject or age appropriateness at least occasionally.]

it might be more interesting to see what he does.

[puzzlerprince.livejournal.com]

What the criminal does, you mean? Once he's imprisoned?

B;

[partytoastess.livejournal.com]

You kill them obviously! They're promoting violence, and violence is never okay.

Those that promote war or war related antics must be eliminated at all costs. At least they go out more peacefully than those that Nena has to kill!

[puzzlerprince.livejournal.com]

But is execution not an act of violence in itself?