Riddle 029: Where is the Father?

[questionauthority]

{First, a public phone call, filtered from drones.]

Hello again, Mayfield. I've been noticing plenty of new faces around town as of late. Plenty of people with plenty of questions.

Every question has an answer, friends---I can guarantee you that. And I, Edward Nigma, can help you find all of these answers. And more. Now, I'm sure I can already predict the next question that's on your minds right now. "What's the catch?" Answer: I I'll be needing your help with a little summer project of mine. Here's your first clue as to what it might be.

“I cannot be seen and I weigh nothing,
But when put into a barrel, I make it lighter.”

What am I?

[It's just after finishing up with this little phone call that he gets his first good look at the calendar. Father's Day. Not exactly Edward's favorite day by any means, given his own relationship with his old man. Needless to say, his mood's been a little bit soured.

Throughout the rest of this lovely day, you're likely to run into the Riddler...

A: In the Backyard of 726 Anderson, sketching something out into a notebook.

B: Out for a drive in the Riddler-Mobile, to try and relax.

C: At Jonathan's Tools, loading up plenty of tools and building supplies into the back of his car.

Wherever he goes, he'll likely be sulking. Cheer him up? Help him out? He's all yours, ladies.]

Comments

[strike-you-out.livejournal.com]

Watching.

What are you doing?

[puzzlerprince.livejournal.com]

Working.

[And back to sketching. If you glance over his shoulder, you'll probably catch glimpses at what appear to be rather large interior designs.]

[strike-you-out.livejournal.com]

[When Slugger next speaks, his voice comes from close behind.]

On what?

[Blueprints are something he's never seen before. It all looks like random shapes to him.]

[puzzlerprince.livejournal.com]

[He turns to face Slugger.]

If you must know, I'm sketching out just what the inside of our new headquarters is going to look like.

[strike-you-out.livejournal.com]

[Headquarters? This must be the 'summer project' Edward was going on about. Slugger looks at the drawings once again, closer this time, then glances up and around the yard.]

You're building it in the yard?

[puzzlerprince.livejournal.com]

[Edward shakes his head, smirking.]

Not exactly.

[He taps his foot against the ground for emphasis.]

[strike-you-out.livejournal.com]

Under the yard?

How?

[puzzlerprince.livejournal.com]

A simple question with an even simpler answer.

We dig.

[strike-you-out.livejournal.com]

[There comes a time in every man's life when he must explain to his "son" how a ditch becomes a functional secret evil headquarters.]

Won't it need a ceiling?

[puzzlerprince.livejournal.com]

Picture this, Slugger.

On the surface, it will appear to the rest of the town as though we're in the process of installing a swimming pool. Who wouldn't be, in a hot summer like this? But deep underground, beneath the pool? Our headquarters. Our base of operations.

[strike-you-out.livejournal.com]

Who will build it?

[puzzlerprince.livejournal.com]

We will, of course. I've already put out a call to the Legion and to the whole of the town. We'll find new recruits, and we'll assemble a proper team to dig, excavate, and create.

[strike-you-out.livejournal.com]

[...Unless someone knows what they're doing, this is probably going to create multiple casualties, isn't it?

Exciting.

Grinning, Slugger points to a section of the drawing that's separated from the rest.]

What's this?

[puzzlerprince.livejournal.com]

That? [That, Slugger, would just happen to be a setup for what appears to be a private room. Perhaps a personal study of some sort?] That's none of your business.

[strike-you-out.livejournal.com]

The toilet?

[Don't you just adore his sense of humor, Edward? Whatever it is, he'll find a way in. And while you're designing things, he might as well give you a serious suggestion.]

There should be tunnels.

[puzzlerprince.livejournal.com]

Tunnels...?

[Now that Slugger mentions it...]

Good thinking. It would take some time, but an underground network would be to our advantage.